Lists

Favorite One Liners

Clean Cute Funnies & Profound Truths

Name	Web address	Description

Oscar Wilde		Every saint has a past, every sinner has a future!

Will Rogers		Don't let yesterday use up too much of today

Martin Luther King Jr		Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

Martin Luther King Jr		Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

Chiari Surgery		Surgery does NOT cure chiari, it only accomodates it! Teri Ferguson

The mind and soul conversation		What is more important than knowledge asked the mind. Seeing and Caring with the Heart answered the soul.

Works and Being Saved		You are not Saved by doing Good Works - You are Saved so that you might do Good Works. Pastor Ronnie Cope

Hope		You'll never see the stars if you are always looking down.

Thankfulness		If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday and with the worries of tomorrow, you have no today to be thankful for

Anger		He who angers you, controls you!

Aging Gracefully		Don't think of them as hot flashes, think of them as your inner child playing with matches.

Attendance		Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church

Attendance		Don't wait to attend church until you are on the way out of this world!

Attendance		I don't know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?

Attitude		Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.

Belief's		I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, Than live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is.

Control		Never give the devil a ride. He will always want to drive.

Church Attendance		Beat the Christmas rush, come to church this Sunday

Church Attendance		Soul Food Served Here

Christianity		Prevent Truth Decay - Brush up on your Bible

Christianity		Try Jesus! if you find you don't like Him, the devil will always take you back

Church Attendance		You are not too bad to come in Your are not too good to stay out

Church Attendance		This is a C H -- C H What is missing?

Church Attendance		Come in and have your faith lifted.

Church Attendance		Try the Sundays at Church, They are better than Baskin-Robbins

Christianity		the best vitamin for a Christian is B1

Changes		We don't change the message, the message changes us.

Choices		Forbidden fruits create many jams

Choices		Don't put a question mark where God put a period

Choices		It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one

Complaints		Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.

Chance		Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever.

Devil - Kevin Spacey in "The Usual Suspects"		"the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist!"

Death		He who dies with the most toys is still dead

Death		Death is not extinguishing the Light; it is putting out the Lamp because the Dawn has come.

Direction		If God is your co-pilot, swap seats

Enemies and Friends - Mark Twain		It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you: the one to slander you, and the other to get the news to you.

Eternity		Life has many choices, Eternity has two. What's yours?

Eternity		Where will you be sitting in eternity? Smoking or non-smoking

Eternity		Life is Hard Afterlife is Harder - depending on your decision

Faith		Worry looks around - Sorry looks back - Faith looks up!

Faith		Faith is the ability to not panic

Faith (By Elton Trueblood)		Faith is not belief without proof But trust without reservation

Forgiveness		The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

Frustration		When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there

Grudges		A grudge is a heavy thing to carry

Hardheadedness		Some minds are like concrete - thoroughly mixed up and permanently set

Habits		People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.

Inspiration		Aspire to Inspire before you Expire

Love, Poetic		When you're swimmin' in the creek And an eel bites your cheek That's a Moray! -- Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers

Judgement		God loves everyone, but probably prefers "fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts!"

Judgement		God grades on the cross, not the curve

Judging		We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges

Judging		God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead - So why should you?

Justice, Mercy & Grace		Justice - when you get what you deserve Mercy - when you don't get what you deserve Grace - when you get what you don't deserve

Laughter		Laugh every day, it is like inner jogging

Leadership		In order to be a leader you must be willing to move forward alone.

Marriage		to someone you don't like is like living with a cellmate rather than a spouse

Moments of your Life		Happy Moments.... Praise God--- Difficult Moments.... Seek God ----Quiet Moments.... Worship God ----Painful Moments.... Trust God---- Every Moments.... Thank God

Manners		Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.

Obedience		What part of "Thou Shalt Not" don't you understand?

Opportunity - Temptation		Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever

Problems		When we get tangled up in our problems, be still. God wants us to be still so he can untangle the knot

Prayer		As a child of God, prayer is kind of like calling home everyday

Problems		Dear God, I have a problem, it's Me!

Prayer		God answers kneemail

Prayer		it is hard to stumble when you are down on your knees.

Preparation		It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark

Problems		Don't tell God how big your problem is - tell the problem how big your God is!

Protection		The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you

Peace		Peace starts with a smile

Prayer		If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has

Purpose		The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.

Results		Satan subtracts and divides. God adds and multiplies

Repentance		The wages of sin is death. Repent before payday

Service		Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors.

Seeing God		Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous

Service		God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called

Service		Don't give God instructions - just report for duty!

Service		The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.

Saved!		Walmart isn't the only "saving place"

Success AND Happiness		Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get

Trials		God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

Worries		If you worry, you didn't pray. If you pray, don't worry!

Worrying		Worrying...It's like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but doesn't get you anywhere.

Words		Silence is often misinterpreted, but never misquoted

Witnessing		Christians, keep the faith...but not from others!

Witnessing		Preach the gospel at all times. Use words if necessary

Worry		Worry is interest paid on trouble before it is due.

Witness		Be ye fishers of men. You catch them - He'll clean them

Worries		Don't let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.